Romanticizing your life: how to be the main character.
- Hannah Oliver
- Nov 29, 2020
- 4 min read
I am someone who is more addicted to TikTok than I like to admit.
In a lot of ways, it probably is unhealthy: comparing myself to the hundreds of beautiful people who just keep appearing on my ‘for you’ page, being kept up far too late every night because an hour on TikTok flies by like 5 minutes, and getting annoying, stupid snippets of annoying, stupid songs stuck in my head on repeat to the point that my boyfriend, who is most definitely NOT on the same side of TikTok as I am, is actually being driven more and more insane with every passing minute that he spends with me.
However, there is one TikTok trend which has been, and still is, changing my life little by little every day: learning how to romanticize your life.
'It’s as weird and egotistic as it sounds. But it works.'
For anyone who is new to and confused by this concept (as many of my friends were when I first sent a very chaotic message into our group chat saying ‘OMG guys you need to get on this trend, it will change your life’), I am going to try and explain it in the best way I possibly can.
romanticize; verb [ I ] (UK also romanticise)
To romanticize your life is fundamentally to walk around pretending, and fully believing, that you are the main character in a teenage coming-of-age rom com. It is imagining that the plot follows your life through every action you take, that everyone you pass in the street is life-alteringly struck by the fleeting yet powerful impression you left on them. It is hearing a nostalgic soundtrack playing over your every move: a 00s indie hit when you take the bins out on a Monday evening; a boyband ballad when you’re laying in bed comfort eating a stack of junk food; a chorus of ‘Don’t you forget about me’ which faintly echoes around the room every time you shut the lid of your laptop after an online lecture, as you are overwhelmingly compelled to put on your leather jacket and fist bump the air.
It’s walking the long way home from the café because you’re a mysterious, independent woman who loves exploring nature. It’s wearing a cute dress and doing your hair for a night at home spent drinking wine in the kitchen alone because you’re not like other girls. It’s also, according to TikTok, a series of dramatic facial expressions, a slow and meaningful walk, and the imperative holy grail of a Lana Del Ray song.
It’s as weird and egotistic as it sounds. But it works.
In actual fact, this concept is not new to me at all. When I was around 15/16, I did this without even knowing it had a technical term. I ‘romanticized’ my life in the way that naturally I think 15 year olds do, naïve to the often mundane reality of every day life and still believing that their very own meet-cute is always just around the corner. It’s hard to explain, but I maintain that everyone has felt and done this to some degree at some point in their life, and so it is possible to tap into that feeling again, and use it to fit and enhance your own means and intentions.
My personal experience since I have rediscovered this concept has honestly been amazing. It forced me to occasionally get changed out of my slobby uni student uniform of joggers and a hoody and into real clothes because the main character would probably get dressed at least once or twice a week (unless it was Bella from that one scene in Twilight where the seasons pass in front of her eyes but she doesn’t move from her bedroom chair, which honestly is a lot like how life in lockdown feels right now). It causes me to get up and go for a walk, even if it is only so that I can put my headphones in and dramatically live out this artsy scene in my head which I am creating with every embarrassingly theatrical step. It encourages me to view myself in a more positive light as someone who is noticed, interesting, desirable, and worthy of ‘screen time’, and as someone with a purposefully created plot, who has things to do and motivation to do them. It is also just a bit of fun. And as cringey as it is (believe me, I’m aware, it is VERY cringey), I can’t ignore the genuine positive effects it has had on my life.
So next time you’re returning an online-shopping-spree-gone-wrong to the local post office, imagine it’s the opening scene. When you burn your dinner because you absolutely cannot cook to save a life, see it as an endearing character trait, and you as the clumsy and awkward, yet very likeable, main love interest.
I’m not saying it’s the cure to all of your life’s problems. But I think any mindset which can enhance your life and your happiness in some way or another, without harming yourself of anyone else, is without a doubt worth trying.
(Just a few more, for reference:
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